


Shizuo's Helpful Hallucination

by KaiKoizumi



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Denial of Feelings, Hallucinations, M/M, Slow Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-21
Updated: 2017-06-03
Packaged: 2018-10-08 16:13:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,688
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10390722
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaiKoizumi/pseuds/KaiKoizumi
Summary: One day, Shizuo starts seeing a pink and white Izaya that helps him in different areas of his life.





	1. Seeing Double

“Izayaaaaa,” Shizuo started as he slowly walked up to his sworn enemy. “What's with the weird get up you louse?”

He was dressed in a double breasted coat similar to his normal clothing, however this coat was white with pink fur. It had little pink buttons to match. He was also wearing white pants along white and pink shoes. A pair of pink and white bulky headphones sat on his head. He pouted.

“Shi-chan is so mean! Psyche's name is Psyche!” He whined. “And I'm not a louse.” He crossed his arms, muttering the last part.

Shizuo cracked his knuckles. “Heh, doesn't matter what name you call yourself. A flea is still a flea and I'm still gonna beat the ever living shit out a' you.”

“Aw, is Shizu-chan practicing just for me?” Izaya's voice pipped up behind him as Shizuo was about to throw a punch. “I'm flattered that you care so much about me that you feel the need to practice~!”

Shizuo whipped his head around.

“What the hell?” He said looking between them. “Why are there two of you?”

Izaya threw his head back and laughed, pointing at Shizuo. “Shizu-chan's finally lost it!” He smirked and quirked an eyebrow at Shizuo. “Are you seeing me when I'm not there because you think about me all the time? How obsessed can you get Shizu-chan?”

“Don't fuck with me, flea!” Shizuo yelled, gritting his teeth. He pulled up a nearby sign and swung at Izaya.

The sign narrowly missed him, but he immediately swung it again. When Psyche ran in front of Shizuo, he halted the sign mid-swing.

“Wait, Shi-chan can't kill Iza-chan!” Psyche yelled.

“Why the fuck not?” Shizuo asked.

“Because Shi-chan's soulmate is Iza-chan!” the pink and white Izaya answered cheerily.

“To hell I am!” He replied. He swung the sign again as Psyche jumped out of the way. Shizuo shot him a glare. “I'll deal with you after I deal with the original flea.”

Izaya was caught off guard by Shizuo's strange behaviour and almost got hit with the sign that came flying like a jousting pole in his direction. He ducked out of the way as another sign came flying at him.

“Shizu-chan, are you that distracted by your daydream of me?” Izaya yelled as Shizuo chased him down the street.

Soon enough, Psyche was forgotten about and they fell into their usual chase around Ikebukuro.

 

\-----

 

“Alright, so why do I have some weird version of the flea following me around?” Shizuo asked.

He was sitting in Shinra's apartment on the couch. It had been a few days since the first incident with Psyche. Shizuo had realized Psyche was in fact a hallucination when Tom and Vorona said they couldn't see him. The Izaya look-a-like was there almost everywhere Shizuo went. He was there at work, at home, in the city. Shizuo had even opened the curtain to the shower to find the younger male staring at him.

At work, he stopped Shizuo from throwing people while after work, he stopped Shizuo from chasing after Izaya. The latter wasn't hard to do considering Shizuo had been avoiding Izaya over the past few days. He couldn't stand one flea, much less two. Then again, this flea seemed a lot more bearable, though he was overly cheery to the point it annoyed him. It was surprisingly hard for Shizuo to get angry at Psyche. He was something akin to an overgrown, mostly innocent child.

“Well,” Shinra started, laughing a little. “It could be that all the stress in your life is manifesting itself in the form of an Izaya that's easier to get along with. Think of it like a coping mechanism almost! You said it's urging you to do what you think you need to do, right?” He shrugged. “You could just ignore it, of course. In fact, if you want to get rid of it, that's what you should do. It should be easy enough to ignore. I mean, it's only a visual or auditory hallucination and not physical, correct?”

“Right.” He paused. “Hey Shinra, what if... I start having physical hallucinations?”

“Well in that case I would assume someone got you with a drug.” He pushed his glasses up. “That, or you're showing late signs of schizophrenia. Of course, we probably would have seen more symptoms in high school like severe agitation or anger, compulsive behavior, paranoia, disassociating, and a number of other symptoms.” He paused, realizing that Shizuo _did_ have a number of those symptoms in high school. “I'm sure you'll be fine! I highly doubt you're schizophrenic!” He said, waving his hand.

“Right, yeah.” Shizuo said, watching Psyche wander around the room. Something about the main explanation sounded wrong, but he couldn't place what it was. He shook his head and stood up. “Thanks. Heh. It was really getting to me.”

“It would get to anyone if they had an Izaya constantly following them around.” Shinra commented as Shizuo started toward the door.

“Yeah, see you later.” Shizuo agreed, leaving the apartment with Psyche close behind him.

“Hehe, Shin-chan is funny! Psyche isn't Shi-chan's hallucination!” He leaned slightly forward as they walked with his hands behind his back. “Psyche is your guardian angel!” He said, springing up and putting his hands in the air.

Shizuo pinched the bridge of his nose.

Ignoring this figment was gonna be hard, wasn't it?

_I need a cigarette._

 


	2. Food For Thought

“Why would I have a guardian angel?” Shizuo muttered, lighting his cigarette as he walked.

“Guardian angels help with love troubles and Shi-chan's love life needs help!” Psyche replied.

“Would you stop calling me that? It pisses me off.” He said, not worried about anyone overhearing him. Night had fallen so anyone who did catch the one-sided conversation would just think Shizuo was drunk. “And I don't need any help. My love life is perfectly fine.” He took a drag of his cigarette.

The truth was he didn't have a love life but that was perfectly fine with him. Sure, maybe having a lover would be nice. Someone who looked pretty and had a nice personality. Vorona was a possibility. Tom did make comments here and there about how Vorona must have a thing for Shizuo. She was smart, beautiful, and more importantly strong. She didn't seem terrified of Shizuo and now that he thought about it, getting with Vorona would make a lot of sense.

The only problem was Shizuo didn't feel that way toward her. They worked together. Vorona was his kohai. Shizuo would treat her to cakes at the cafe and talk about work. She would ask him questions concerning Japanese. Sometimes she would even ask for advice. In reality she was more like a little sister to Shizuo than a love interest.

Psyche walked backward, facing Shizuo as he spoke. “Nu-uh! Shi-chan is in love with Iza-chan but doesn't realize it!” He put a curled finger to his lip and looked up. “Though Psyche supposes Shi-chan could know it, but doesn't want to admit it.” He looked down. It seemed more like he was talking to himself than to Shizuo.

“Psyche, we _hate_ each other. We have since we met.” the blond sighed. “I don't need to explain myself to you. You're just a hallucination like Shinra said.”

“So let's say Psyche is a hallucination,” Psyche said, carrying a more serious tone. “Why would you be hallucinating someone based on the person you claim to hate and not care about?” Before Shizuo had a chance to respond, Psyche pressed on. “Wouldn't it make more sense to hallucinate another version of Kasuka or Celty? Even Tom or Kyouhei would make more sense, wouldn't they? So why Iza-chan?”

Shizuo opened his mouth and closed it. He did this a few times before falling silent and searching for an answer. Their crunching footsteps became white noise as Shizuo contemplated Psyche's question. His frown only deepened and his eyes grew concerned. His cigarette was long forgotten about, the ashes falling periodically.

“It... doesn't make sense, does it?” Shizuo finally said. Psyche was right; he would never hallucinate Izaya as some kind of helper. He locked eyes with Psyche. “Well, that only establishes you're real. Your appearance doesn't establish any feelings I might have towards Izaya.”

“But Psyche is supposed to look like Shi-chan's soulmate!” Psyche whined. He pouted. “Shi-chan is being stubborn and dumb!” Crossing his arms, he looked away, voice falling into a whisper. “Psyche's just trying to help. Why can't Psyche help Shi-chan the way he's supposed to?”

Shizuo knew Psyche was just trying to do what he thought was right- and Shizuo did feel bad-, but Izaya hated him. They were talking about the guy who had tried multiple times to kill him. Izaya was cruel and horrible and annoying. The flea was better off dead. If he was dead, Shizuo wouldn't have to waste his time chasing him around Ikebukuro. He wouldn't need to waste his breath yelling him. He wouldn't need to waste any energy on him at all. If Izaya was dead Shizuo would be thrilled.

They had reached the apartment. Shizuo furrowed his eyebrows.

“I'd be thrilled if Izaya were dead.” He commented, trying to convince Psyche as well as himself. He unlocked his door.

“If you really wanted to kill him, you would have already done it, Shi-chan.” Psyche said plainly as Shizuo set his key on the counter near the door.

“Tch. Whatever.” Shizuo replied, walking into his bedroom.

After getting ready for bed, Shizuo tugged the blanket over him and Psyche. Psyche sleeping in his bed had been slightly unnerving, not to mention annoying, the first few nights, but Psyche insisted he should. Now it was oddly comforting. Shizuo briefly wondered if angels even needed sleep before his thoughts drifted back to Izaya.

 _I'd be thrilled, right?_ He thought as he neared sleep. As his eyes shut, he focused on Psyche's face and for a moment he looked like he could actually be Izaya. _I'd be..._

_“Good night Shizu-chan.”_

_Upset?_

“G'night 'Zaya.” Shizuo muttered, his brain unable to differentiate Izaya and Psyche in it's sleepy state.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long! Between migraines and other fanfics I haven't posted yet, I didn't get around to finishing the second chapter until a few days ago. It's a little shorter than the last chapter, and for that I apologize! I'm having a lot of fun writing this so far and figuring out how to write a romance where they aren't already established lovers or abrupt. How am I doing with that so far?  
> Feedback is very much appreciated and thanks for reading~!

**Author's Note:**

> So! I kind of got the idea for this after I finished AnoHana, the flower we saw that day. It's gonna be a multi-chapter fanfic that I'm gonna update randomly. Possible Psyche/ Shizuo later, but I'm not sure. I'm still working on the two bigger fanfics I want to post here, but I wanted to try my hand at one where I post it chapter by chapter rather than writing the entire thing! There will be funny bits and serious bits. I want to have a lot of fun writing this, so I have no clue what this story will end up entailing! It'll be an adventure!
> 
> Thank you for reading and tell me what you think~!


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